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Thoughts From My Couch
Love changes everything
I was still in school when I heard this Andrew Lloyd Weber song for the first time. I fell hopelessly in love in grade 9 and for two years I was in my own hypnotic love-sick state of love; listening to this song over and over.
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I was still in school when I heard this Andrew Lloyd Weber song for the first time. I fell hopelessly in love in grade 9 and for two years I was in my own hypnotic love-sick state of love; listening to this song over and over.

The true (or let me rather say a ‘deeper’) meaning of love and the miraculous power of it, I only discovered many years later when I entered the field of therapy and started training people.

It was on a recent Training course while I was doing a demonstration with one of the delegates using a technique called Visual/Kinaesthetic dissociation; that I again remembered these words: Love changes everything.......

The lady who was the demo subject was working with the death of her father a few years before and how to come to terms with it. This is also what the V/K technique is used for: healing trauma and pain from the past. We were halfway through the technique when something bordering on the miraculous happened.......

She was sitting with her eyes closed tears rolling down her cheeks when the door at the back of the room slowly opened a bit more and one of the dogs from the owners of the conference centre, slowly came walking in.......

I will never forget the expression on the dog’s face. He was frowning intensely and slowly walking to the front, all his attention on her.......the room was so silent that one could hear the breathing of everyone in the room.

There are times when one just knows there is something happening at a deeper level, although at that moment it is not easy to make conscious sense of it. I felt a intense concern and care coming from that dog as he walked to the front of the class and came and sit in front of her. There was a expression on his face which was coming from beyond, to put it in words is almost impossible; almost if he wanted to say something. The atmosphere in the room changed and it felt like time stood still.

I finished the technique with her and he left the room again; as if what he came to do was done.

It was only later that day that the true significance of this event came to light. She told me that her father was a very hard man with an inability to express love. It was a few months before his death that for the first time she saw and experienced his loving side when she got a puppy and her father transformed, caring and cuddling this puppy. “I couldn’t believe that this was my father,” she said.  “All these years all I wanted was some demonstration of love, and he was showing it to my dog. I have never seen him like this, so loving and caring. I just wanted him once to say, I care and love you, but then he suddenly died in the accident.”

I didn’t want to say anything; just looked her in the eyes. It was like a book opening suddenly. “Is this possible,” she asked in disbelief. “Did you see his eyes?”, she asked. I just nodded.

Later in the day while she was sitting on her own; the same dog slowly came walking up to her again and we all just observed from a distance. During the whole of the course that was the only time the dog chosen to make contact with anyone........

The next morning the other dog which was quite a scared dog and also avoiding all contact with humans also came walking up to her and put his head on her lap. The owner said that this has never ever happened before......

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